When things goes wrong...

2010-09-12T05:36:00.000-07:00

yeah, when things goes wrong..
;D
i'm not going to tell her anymore, not anymore.
absolutely nothing..
i trust ppl too easily, i shall not anymore.
i shall trust you, yeah you..
the only one in the mirror with my reflection. ;D

no longer crying on sugar, shall go with the wind even if it's wrong. ;D

Oral 2010!

2010-07-06T07:47:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow, 7/7/10
will be my first O lvl oral, CL.
Wish me lucks. <3

2010-07-06T07:46:00.000-07:00

If i can get into a course i want,
i swear i'll study hard for it.

Wrong Wind.

2010-07-05T09:11:00.001-07:00

I believe that by doing these..
i will forget you..
for your sake, i will let you go and stay behind.
it doesn't matter whether i've really let go or not.
what matters is.
to you, i have.
for i believe that true love nvr dies.
if does, it's not true love.
and well, you proved to me. ^^
rmb you no more.
think of you no more.
contact no more.

life've gone wrong.

2010-06-07T22:34:00.000-07:00

Don't seek, don't search, don't ask, don't knock, don't demand - relax. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, God shows you the way.

2010-05-27T08:06:00.000-07:00

I saw the number twice in a row. -.-!

2010-05-22T10:05:00.000-07:00

I totally agrees with the horoscope thing. omg! <3

Cry a river, build a bridge and get over it.

2010-05-17T08:50:00.000-07:00

Footprints of in my life.

That's the one~ (:

credits to emily~

Credits to Winston ;D

Credits to Winston~

Haojun and I at S'pore Conf Hall for kids' concert. -.-!

Eunice, Grace and I at 888 KFC! haha.

Black and White~ Cool? ;D

Alright, i've updated my blog! ;D

2010-04-20T07:27:00.000-07:00

i got so fk up that i cry in school today. _|_

fker.

_ not in good mood then say la.

take wrong paper say till machiam our fault.

ppl copy me, they correct i wrong.

wth.

okay fine.

i ask my friend, _ say go else whr and ask. i dont wan hear your voice, you very noisy.

cb sia, i just ask for the method of doing right. _|_

see you bad mood, sua!

then i re-do everything for _, keep telling me wrong.

ccb, answer correct can. _|_

then i write the working out for _.

4x10=40

2x2=4

(4x10)+(2x2)= 4F

F=11N

correct right!

_ say wrong.

._.

_ say can only be (4x10)+(2x2)=4F

like that, then i ask _ how come?

then _ say, you dont raise your voice at me.

wtf la.

i nvr fking hell raise my voice at _ can!

_ tio menses la! ccb.

i sibei dulan hor!

cb, nvr kajiao _ then come scold me for wad.

still dare say not scolding.

then wad the fuck is scolding? _|_

fking bad mood becoz of _.

then chiong to chinese lesson, got another paper to do. -.-

DAMN FK LA.

then my MT cher saw me crying, then ask wad happened.

so i told her lo.

then she say, from your side. i think _ really too much, maybe _ got a bad day.

_ BAD DAY, _ PROBLEM LA! ccb. -.-

WADEVA ! _|_ _|_ _|_

FUCK YOU!

tmr playing solo for some china ppl.. ;D

hope i wont play wrong.

peiyan's fault.

dont wan play with me. ._.

MOOD RUIN X1000.

FUCKING ASSHOLE!

i didn't mention who _ is.

if you think _ is that somebody then so be it.

i'm not breaking any law, you get it?

THIS IS NOT DEFAMATION!

understand?

2010-04-19T05:22:00.001-07:00

Your Love Horoscope
Your capacity to be direct is going to come in handy today, Virgo when it comes to settling matters of the heart. You have until recently been using your skills of patience and organization to deal with some issues in love, and today you are ready to act as your balance of patience is almost depleted. Whether you are single or attached, today you are able to communicate your needs and desires, and possibly even some differences, in a clear and concise manner. There is nobody right now that will not know where you stand by the day's end, and they will respect you more for it.

2010-04-18T05:31:00.000-07:00

All your friends can say is ' forget bout him, he's a jerk.. ya-da ya-da'
who exactly understand you?
everybody are in different condition to say.

Went for class early in the morning, missed my morning run. D:
well, i slept.
ahhhhh!
two hours plus only. D:
woke up just nice at 5.30 ;D
then leave house at 5.50~
managed to catch the bus to int and first 168 bus <3
i got so blur in the morning, i forgot to bring my jacket out.
was freezing to death after i reach the first floor. :x
worse still, on the bus.
then went to slack a while and home sweet home.
went for tuition and..
-.-
dont wan elaborate le.
bo liao.
change teacher again. -'-
but better la.
at least. -.-
ya ya~
slacked with chuan shun (a while), wei jie and wei jie's friend. so weird. :x
talk crap then stop raining le jiu go for dinner with emily~
wei jie and his friend funny la! haha. :x
gay kiss. omg.
gay fk somemore. ;D
gays~
ohhh!
my two cous bro also.
wa piang, all 20+ le still gay on FACEBOOK. LOL !
cute la they all. hahas.
was talking then looked downstairs and saw jeffrey~ <3
he cute la, haha!!
he got GOOD eyesight man!
so far still can see me. hahas.
our sexist. :x
oops!
speaking of this, 12 june <3
look forward kay!
while i dig for a song to play~ ;D
solo solo solo solo!!!!

School's on tmr. D:

Nvrtheless, i had a wonderful weekend. ;D
esp. the amazing race~~ woohoo!

while slacking in the late morning,
i felt that i'm fortunate.
very fortunate indeed.
and after ysd, i know that cutting is stupid.
so little blood, gone to waste.
i'm waiting for 18 b'day!
let's go donate 1Litre of BLOOD! <3

2010-04-17T10:15:00.001-07:00

I feel alittle terrible now. :x
maybe too much running and gassy drinks at Suntec today. :x
hands are super tired. D:
the first time i play basketball till my arms went numb. :xxxx
but the feeling is cool!!
it wont be tmr morning le. :x
i forgot i got class in the morning and i need my arm. :x
it's okay ba~~ :x
sighh.
played the lvl by lvl basketball game at arcade today~
only managed to go lvl two. :x JUST A FEW MARKS TO LVL 3 !!
i'll make it!
played four rounds, then arms totally no energy. :x
after that went Citylink's 7-11 to buy drinks before hsh.
insisted on taking bus..
so we walked from suntec to the millenia walk, by the circumference. =.=
tired x3!
then the bus finally came, he dont let us go up.
he say next stop coz that stop is the last stop before he goes back to the org. route again. __
fk sia!
then we wanted to catch the bus, so we ran through the marina square(?) and towards the next bus stop. -.-!
we managed to catch the bus.
fker sia! i sibei dulan.
in the end, he also have to turn back the same route, why can't he just let us go aboard.
screw you!!!!
alright, hsh at 11+pm.
feeling COOL.
ran around and basketball..
tired MAX !
but not going to sleep le.
coz i dont wan be late for class. :X
so in order to keep myself awake, i'll go for a run later at 4am!
maybe only~
i scared it rain. ;D
or maybe run in the rain, cool !!
HAHA.
<6am need reach woodlands int to catch the first bus to Bedok and to cher's house. ;DDD

basketball = good way of reliefing everything. <3
<3 numbness max!!!!!

2010-04-09T14:29:00.000-07:00

The moment i reached Ipoh,
i knew that i can fight back my tears.
I walked in and offer joss stick.
i did it..
i went over to see my grandmother for the last time..
i failed.
the feeling wasn't very good.
i wasn't really close to her when she was alive as we stay very far and i'm always not able to come back during hols.
but i was wrong..
i felt this special bond between us.
the pale look in her just..
just makes me feel in different.
It wasn't the same as initially when my father's side grandfather passed away.
it's just different.

Rest In Peace Grandmother. You'll live in my heart forever.

I went to my draft to check smth and realised that everything was deleted.
same thing goes to saved items, totally wtf can?
but some people will be glad..
coz..
all the msg that's important to me is gone.
fate-less.
it's okay, hahaha !!

The wake was till 2+am.
stand, kneel, bow, kneel, stand, kneel, bow, kneel and so on for around an hour.
tiring..but it's all for the benefit of my grandmother. ^^

When i die, will there be so many people attending too?
everyone attending with a heavy heart, nobody laughing becoz of the death.
will there be people crying too?
even guys?
i saw my cous bro crying just now..
the first time i saw a man crying..

have anybody cried because of me before? dont think so.
hahaha.

wanted to cut my hair on thursday..
but..
now cannot alrdy.
have to wait for a month.
sweep mood. D:
who wanna cut bangs? ;DDD
i think i'll just stick to my emo fringe ba..
;D
it's 5.48am le..
i'm still not asleep..
and here i am, at LAN SHOP !
have to assemble <8am coz going to chu1 bing1 later.

daddy say wan let me go home alone tonight.
D:
so bad.
8 hours bus trip eh..

it's okay uh.. ;DD

dunno why recently keep thinking bout the negative outcomes.
maybe the bus will swerve and hit the tree.
aiya, wadeva it is.
i keep thinking bout these. D:

you know hor, i wanted to be such a good girl and do my SS hw.
then jacq say will email me the answer then she nvr.
then in that case, i should have come over to LAN shop. >:
then now come here zuo bo.
sian max.
tan wah sing got alot of maths hw sia.
will try to do abit.
sian sian sian!

i'm tired..
still tired..
physically and mentally.
i'm fucking tired.

gonna miss today's CIP work. DDDD:
i wan go!!
but i can't.
it's going to be so fun la !!!
>: !!
sian..
there goes my CIP work of the year.

i feel like a failure.. D:

2010-03-31T06:40:00.001-07:00

'Sorry' dont cures everything. 'Thank you' dont tells everything. They are words that comfort people a little bit but it seldom works. When things get serious, you think a 'sorry' can change the upset and disappoint feeling in a person? When the person have done so much for you, you think a 'thank you' can express the appreciation of his help?

2010-03-30T08:03:00.000-07:00

jiu suan le ba..
everything jiu suan le ba.
不管我多努力，你们还是不了解。
即时我使出了我的最努力，也是失败。
那么样来说，不管我付出了多少，都没有人会知道。
不求回报地，但求点认可。
我累了，我真的累了。
想找个时间休息也很难，你觉得我真的不在乎吗？
你觉得我不难受吗？得到的成绩是活该？
你不知道吗，我的人生就是如此的失败。
失败到无药可救。就别管我吧。
没人叫你管，那就别管。就让我自生自灭。
失败乃兵家常事，就习惯了吧。

11.09 already, homework still not finished. disappointed with me? too bad then.
coz imma nth but a sucker.

2010-03-28T03:43:00.000-07:00

Phone's off.
anything URGENT that's concerning life and death then call my house.
if not, too bad. ;D

2010-03-28T03:15:00.000-07:00

Nothing matters anymore.

it's different this time right?

to me, it is.

but i dont think to you.

maybe it's the same.

dont lie to yourself, pls.

that's the last thing i wan.

i've thought about it, if this is wad you wan then i shall grant you.

i wont hold you back anymore, there wont be any more promises.

coz no matter how many promises there is,

no matter how many you've made, it's just pointless.

things you said you will do, can just forget it.

maybe you wont remember, but i do.

everything.

nvm uh, it's okay.

dont bother to find back anything.

seriously dont bother but thanks for trying.

nothing of mine is your business anymore.

things that happened two days ago are just lies aren't they?

words that touched? lies?

hmmm..

bet you've tot over it for some time before making this choice right?

actually, it doesn't matter.

not anymore.

2010-03-25T01:02:00.000-07:00

Alright, proper blog. :x
my blog like rose lesson like that. :x
speaking of which, WHR'S MDM ROSE?
no wonder i see one lesser teacher for co-in-charge. -.-

Lessons in air-con rooms are..sian..
nose block block, cannot breathe. -.-
but chem is fun! haha.
coz jiarong and i siao one. :x
aiya, i find it boring leh.
keeping typing in this rectangular box. -.-
gonna off soon and bathe. ;D
it's raining cats and dogs now. :x
if only i'm still in school.
HAHA.
can walk under the rain home. ROAR!
but anyway, i love my LOCKER NUMBER! ;DDD
想死吧 (wish to die!)
haha!!
cool anot!! ;DD
it'll be mine till oct!! ;DD
or nov?
forgot le. :x
aiya, after Prelims.
my locker will be lending my juniors le, no diff.
see uh, if i bring all my stuffs home..
then the locker empty, diao can.
(i could feel the vibration when the thunder went off, -.-)

OH YA, ysd.
shiok can.
carry the drums like carrying weights like that.
so heavy. >:
and the kids weren't helpful AT ALL.
as in, it's THEIR job !!!
our percussionists used to carry all of them down and up on their own can?
now leh?
seniors carry. -.-
wth, kids nowadays are SPOILT man!

2010-03-25T00:33:00.000-07:00

Purple Roses!

Dried Purple Rose is still pretteh can? ;D

Blue Roses! ;D

White Roses!

White Rose Buds!

Purple Rose~! :x

Purple and Blue Roses!

Purple and White Roses!

Plus bear! <3

Blue and White Roses! ;D

2010-03-25T00:08:00.000-07:00

Meaning of Purple Roses

Purple roses are one of the innovations developed by man to express another emotion. This particular color has various levels of meanings, and has always been a favorite among rose lovers.

Purple roses primarily stand for enchantment. The giver of the purple rose seeks to convey that he or she has fallen in love with the recipient at the very first sight. A deep magnetism and charm that makes the recipient almost irresistible is what the purple rose seeks to convey. The very first meeting has totally enticed the sender of these flowers, who simply cannot resist the object of his desire.

Though purple speaks of enchantment, the meaning of the purple rose nowhere suggests permanence. The enchantment can be transcendental and can also be fleeting. As the word "enchantment" suggests, the effect is almost magical, and can also die off without much warning.

The purple rose has certain other meanings. Opulence, glory and majesty are some other interpretations given to the purple rose. Purple being a color of elegance and grandeur, it only fits that the rose also pays tribute to these characteristics.

The most widespread meaning of the purple rose is enthrallment, especially at first sight. Because of this, our purple feather rose is a hot favorite on Valentine's Day. And though there is no indication of permanence in this attraction, there is definitely a deep impression created. So, the next time you are bowled over by someone at first sight and feel totally enthralled, remember to send him or her a few purple feather roses.

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What's with the feather?! LOL !
but anyway, dont you guys find purple roses unique and INTERESTING? ;D
maybe becoz i like purple, BUT it's COOL !!!
see, i highlighted all the 'purple' words in PURPLE! ;DDD
dont like to get craze over A colour.
seems so mad.
though i fancy purple but not to an extend like how :
Joan LOVES purple,
Pei Yan LOVES erhu,
Emilyy LOVES pig
or!
Yuitlin LOVES strawberry.
ta-da.
conclusion : i just fancy purple. ^^
i'll hate purple if everything of mine is purple.
EEEEEEEEEEW?
maybe blue is alright.
haha.
but still, purple rose~ <3

WOOHOO!! PURPLE ROSE.
oh wait, did i give somebody purple rose on V'tines this year?
omg. :x
recap, recap.
i think i didn't. :x

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There's no true purple rose? o.0?!
That's lying my feelings man!

A True Purple Rose?
There is actually no true purple rose. The category of purple roses includes the colors of lilac, blue, plum and lavender. The colors are usually pastel in nature. The purple rose first made an appearance in the only 1800s. The purple rose was a hybrid of the standard European rose with the variety of roses introduced from China.

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One more new point!

The lighter shades of purple would convey love at first sight and true love where as the darker shades would indicate a deeper and long-term love and romance.

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Lavender: conveys enchantment and mystical love.
Deep purple: lasting love, this color is often seen at wedding anniversaries past the 25th year mark.
A lavender rose with no thorns: love at first sight.

The blue rose: as the blue rose is not found naturally it has come to mean the unattainable. It can also mean mysterious and wondrous.

Hey, BLUE ROSE!! ;DDD

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Say bye to 'Purple' and Hi to ' Blue'! haha.
let's not be so bias.
We're gonna concentrate on PURPLE! ;DDD

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The purple rose is a flower with a complex meaning.
For a truly memorable bouquet sending purple roses will add an aura of enchantment and wonder. Using the subtle art of the language of flowers, or Floriography, can add a romantic dimension to your gift of roses and occasion.
When using the language of flowers be certain to include a personal message to reinforce your intended meaning, as the complex in special meanings of flowers and colors is no longer common knowledge.
However, the recipient of your gift will certainly appreciate the aura of enchantment and love that the purple rose brings to every occasion.

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Interesting Fact!

White Roses.

- ultimate symbol of purity and innocence
- wonderful feeling of po siti ve vibes, peace and tranquility
- understated and modest beauty holds great significance
- symbol for interesting concepts

Myths / Legends

As one myth has it, the first rose on Earth was a white rose, and it miraculously transformed to other hues. The pure white rose was said to have been tainted by blood, making it red; and it was also made to blush from a kiss, making it pink.

Another myth came from the Ancient Greeks. It was said that roses were originally white until one day Aphrodite the Goddess of Love and Beauty pricked herself with the thorns of a rose. The blood that dripped from her finger turned the white roses red.

These myths indicate the loss of innocence, which is the absolute opposite of what the white rose symbolizes – innocence and purity.

White roses as symbol of purity & marriage

The white rose is known as the traditional wedding flower and as such, it signifies pureness of a newly formed bond between lovers.

White roses and funerals

White roses are versatile such that they can be used to celebrate happy occasions such as weddings, as stated above, or to offer condolences at a funeral. White roses are a symbol of honour, heavenliness, spiritual love and respect; which is why they are perfect to remember loved ones who have already passed on. White roses are also a symbol of a holy and spiritual union between the departed soul and God in heaven.

White roses – a symbol of secrecy and loyalty

The white rose is also known as a symbol for confidentiality and fidelity.

Significance of white rose buds ( this is the interesting one! )

White rosebuds, though they are essentially white roses that have yet to blossom, carry a different meaning to full-bloomed white roses.

White rosebuds are in fact a traditional symbol of girlhood and innocence. They represent young girls who have yet to reach adolescence. These rosebuds are an underlying symbol of one being too young for love or to be loved.

Such is the interesting significance and symbolism of white roses. Interesting isn't it, how something simple yet demurely beautiful like the white rose has such a rich and fascinating background?

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Interesting isn't it? Alright. PICTURES NEXT! ;DD

2010-03-23T07:32:00.000-07:00

Mr Su cute bodoh!
i've sent a private msg to him on Litespeed, writing my CME answers then he tot was EL answers.
HAHA!!
then he reply, he wouldn't mind if it's physics. -.-
then i told him is CME de, he say he'll check with Mr Henry for it.
oh oh, then i replied back saying i've finished my TYS hw and my MCQ got some wrong, will spam him Qs tmr ;D
look forward to Physics tmr aye!! ;DDDD

i'm in love with HW!
actually i love them, it's just that i dont have enough time. D:

2010-03-21T22:47:00.001-07:00

Went to visit my sweet doctor today ^^
and he gave me...err...3 diff types of pills and one cough syrup.
pills. -.-
he knew that i HATE pills yet he gave me majority all pills. >:
but since he gave me 2 days MC, i shall forgive him. ^^
and 12 days excuse from PE. :x
i drank alot of cold water in the morning, hoping my temp will lower.
but it increased.
-.-
38.2.
Cool hurh!
then drag myself home. :x
cross the road with my empty mind.
reached home and realised i forgot to buy lunch. -.-
then mummy cooking her lunch, dont wan cook for me.
i jiu sua !
then went to eat my medi while she cook spag for family~
i took around an hour to eat my medicine can?
coz she keep talking nonsense and make me laugh.
WAS DAMN STUPID LA !
then i was screaming at her, and she's laughing.
-.-
she still dare say i bad mood.
then she ask, you 失恋 uh?
then she kept laughing.
siao.
then dont wan bother her liao.
then say dunno wad bhb to her.
then she say i thin skin that's why so many pimples.
CRAP her !
then i was swallowing my pills while she kept laughing and talking crap and i almost choke.
i think she ate the wrong medi today. -.-
gonna sleep soon. :x
going out later with heavy brain. HAHAHA !!! :x

Take cares ppl.
i'll fine in no time.
perfectly fine. ;DD
will you miss me when you're away?
If every sneeze i make tells me that you miss me, i wont mind to keep sneezing. :x

2010-03-21T22:46:00.000-07:00

i trust you.

dont leave me behind.

2010-03-21T01:36:00.000-07:00

i'm tired. i'm in pain.
i can't stop crying.
stop this.
please, somebody just stop this.
i...can't take it anymore.
even if you wanna end, can't you end it in a less hurtful way?
i wont mind if it's temp but the way you tell me is..end.
i'm afraid.
afraid things will go wrong.
i'm really afraid.

if one day, i go out and gt bang by a car.
i overdosed too many pills and syrups.
i cut myself too deeply.
i fell off the railing.
i knocked myself too hard on the wall.
i punched the wall till my fist turns red and about to start bleeding.

if one day, i were to die.
will you attend my funeral?

i'm afraid things will go wrong.

2010-03-21T01:02:00.001-07:00

i'm living my day like in hell.

2010-03-21T00:42:00.001-07:00

everytime i tell myself suan le..
suan le, no point.
i still can't let it down.
i dont like this feeling, it's just like suffocating me.
i..dont like this feeling.
suan le..
if you really love me, then dont leave me.
that's all i can say.
If you wanna remain single,
jiu...

suan le.

2010-03-20T06:50:00.001-07:00

the sms came too late.

2010-03-20T06:30:00.000-07:00

end or temp end.
idk.
i really dunno.
i'm just waiting..
patiently..

fk you.

i sure i love you forever, i swear.

2010-03-19T08:05:00.000-07:00

i wan to change my life..
to a meaningful life..

2010-03-13T20:36:00.000-08:00

I'm currently at the airport..
failed to find for food. ):
h-u-n-g-r-y!
anyway, plane flying only at 1335.
so early come here for what! eeeek!
oh, i got a window seat <3
yays.
but away from my friends, wonder who's going to sit beside me.
group under god chee wee~
s-i-g-h, but nvm!
i got dewi as my buddy~
such a pity xuanhui's in another group. ):
nvm, i'll see her at night~
woooots! ;D
n-i-g-h-t!

Wednesday <3
looking forward to Sarawak.

love you guys, miss me aites ! <3

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!

2010-03-13T07:45:00.001-08:00

DARYL YUEN, SEE THIS OKAY !
I MISS YOU, YOU ASS ! :XX

2010-03-13T07:08:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow~ ;D
Sarawak !!!!
yayyay!!
plane~~
weeeeee~
;DDD
alright, skip all these.
Had a wonderful night today. ;D
took 3 neoprints with emily and yuitlin~
weeeee~
shall we take again! ;D
abit high alrdy. :x
went bugis in the afternoon with xuanhui, dewi and constance~
Constance was in SERIOUS shopping mood.
she had the urge to buy EVERYTHING.
lols. :x
Next time ba~
gotta go for shopping spree after Os kay ! ;D
looking forward~~
nth much, just had time with friends.
but the heels hurting me. oops :x
gotta sleep soon~
;D

i got a bad feeling..

Daryl's away! omg. ):
sad.
misses. ): ): ):
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek !
alright, dont wanna whine here. :x

dont miss me ppl, doubt any misses though. :x
hehe.
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE !!

2010-03-05T06:38:00.000-08:00

Joke of the day :
EL paper.

To : Mr Ang Vee Pee
Vice-Principal
Evergreen Secondary School

From : Soh Qian Hui
Student of 4 Commitment
Evergreen Secondary School

5th March 2010

I'm serious, i wrote this for my paper today.
Edward, marks pls. ^^

2010-03-03T05:11:00.001-08:00

Forget it..
Hopeless = hopeless.
Unless there's a miracle,
hopeless = a little hope.

X'mas is coming !!!!! ;D

stress is healthy.

Fuck you, no fk myself. -.-
idiot.

2010-02-28T06:42:00.000-08:00

A rdm shot at Chinatown with Dewi and Xuanhui. ;D
on 13 feb i think. :x

The yusheng we had jus now~

my mother's friends~ today's a ladies' night. haha.

Today morning..on the way to the big field to play kite~

Edited photo~

These are taken during the trip to Marina Barrage~

Those guys who were playing at the small pool~

Nice march uh? :x

Tour guide, Bel, me, Jacq~

Our tour guide !

Bel, me, Jacq~

4CMT'10 x2 !

Aminn !

Mr Su and Haidhar.

Jillynn~

Can you see her kite? the cloud is nice~>Rdm shot in class~ :x

Daryl, mum, dad, bro~

gambling :X

shhhh~

My cous sis~

Casino, on 13 Feb~ ;D

The two naked statue. :X

Dog ! ;D

Dog~ >

and last but not least~ MERLION !! ;DDD

Photo post done. ;D

2010-02-28T03:13:00.000-08:00

Here's my reflection for the 10th Anniversary Concert :

updated ! :D

2010-02-27T02:41:00.000-08:00

og upo rbrt ;rsbr ,r.
o derst o;; for. eoyj mp jrdodyamvr.

2010-02-27T02:23:00.000-08:00

It's driving up my neck.

Stand under the pouring water from the shower hose, feel the lightness of the water running down your face. Washing away any tears that stream down your cheek. Do you see me crying? I'm sorry, i'm just washing my face.. Take a deep breathe, and another. Feel the sharp pain in your nose, open your mouth and breathe. You can no longer see the world, your mind black out. You know you have to move away from the water, but you didn't. You rise your head and shake the pain in your head to go away, no effect. The water runs into your mouth and down the throat. You still didn't want to move away. Feeling the shiok-ness of the water coming from the shower hose into your body. *bang bang* (Are you done bathing?!) Time to off the tap and dry yourself. Your body still has the itch to try again.

I wan you to care, i wan you to worry. but the way you talk to me..is just like, demanding. Stick to your game, dont talk to me halfway coz i know the only thing running in your mind is just the game and only the game.. Nothing matters.. but the game..

I'm not going to cry, not going to shed a single tear..
You, the tear, is not allowed to run down from my eye and down my cheek.
You are staying no where else but behind my eyelid, behind the reality.

You understand?
Do you fucking hell understand?

Tomorrow's chinese Valentines.
tomorrow is chinese valentines and it has no meaning.
no meaning, haha.
wanted to meet you but since.. sua.
i'm going to sleep till 12.30 then go for tuition at 1 and back home.

hahahahaha, sua.
You dont get it...coz nth matters.

do you know? no, you dont.
when i keep ending a sms with - hahahahaha / more than 2ha - and nth's funny, smth is wrong.
when i keep ending a sms with - :) - and nth's funny, smth is wrong.
you nvr know..you'll nvr know..and i dont wan you to know..
but i just wanna you to know,
the moment you leave me..
will be the moment i die...
and i swear.
shhhh...

2010-02-24T06:53:00.000-08:00

Buddha once told Monk Pu Ti,
"Jealousy is one of our emotions but it's a very bad emotion once it gets out of hand."

Interesting isn't it?

I'm home, but i'm not anywhere close to Her home. Sigh..
Wanted to post alot but dont wanna sweep mood. :x

I had fun at the Marina Barrage, yeah.
the end.

went woodlands lib to meet daryl and study tgt.
study till lib close then walked to 888 and waited for him to have his dinner, speaking of which.
I hasn't had mine.
nvm, it's alright. ^^

skip skip, have the urge to drop school.
escape from reality.
escape from homeworks.
escape from teachers.

Why can't she understand that the way she look at me is just so fking buaysong and i'm trying really hard to prove her wrong. Why can't she understand? Fuck you, i will prove you wrong. Somebody from other classes told me that she's a great teacher, idk why she say that when she wasn't taught by her before at all. Let alone hear what she call us. That's her perspective but i have mine too.

Feeling tired, physically and mentally..
i'm tired.
i'm tired of being happy.
i'm tired of putting on the happy mask even when i'm not.
i hate myself for getting upset.
i hate myself for getting jealous.
i hate myself for pushing blame.
i hate myself for everything.
because i hate myself, i'm leaving Her further and further.
I want to talk to you, i want you to give me advice.
it's impossible, but i want to get close to you.
Feel your heart, feel your kindness.
spread the love.
but all these are impossible because i hate myself.
because these are impossible, i hate myself even more.

I'm nothing but a failure, failure.
Loser.

Upcoming CT will prove everything.
It's too late, late for what?
you dont have to know.
As long as i know and She know, It's enough.

观音娘娘，请让我相信这世上是有奇迹的。

2010-02-23T03:57:00.001-08:00

Because you care, so you quarrel.

Nth much today.
-.-
Shit TWS -'-
Gonna prove you wrong, sucker !
humji.
always settle with..
i think we have some misunderstanding between us.
-.-
wadeva.
feel so. Fk you!
lol.
Eh, blog dead.
-.-

oh oh oh!
Leong gave us an ang pao each.
haha.
one lollipop~
then MT cher also. wheets !! <3
tmr going marina barrage. :x
sighhh~

2010-02-22T04:39:00.000-08:00

我觉得自己很贱，人们口中说得‘贱女人’。
我觉得自己是双面人，人们口中说得‘妖精’。
说着说着，我觉得我的人生一文不值。
有了目标，少了方向。
活在这种生活，觉得自己的存在是多余的。
浪费了空气，浪费了时间。
我的存在导致大家许多不满，许多悲伤。
我。。。发生了什么事？
我不要知道，

因为我很笨。

Words in red are what i always scold myself. haha!
What is wrong with you.

Moodswing -

2010-02-20T08:26:00.000-08:00

I'm running out of time.
I got a bad feeling, i'm running out of time.
Think of wad will be going on, I'm running out of time.
I'm running out of time !!

fuck.

This is the last lap le ! I'm running out of time, i'm ruinning myself, my life.

Ruined.

I'M RUNNING OUT OF TIME.
FUCK!

2010-02-19T06:31:00.000-08:00

Sometimes i doubt my life.
are these friends really that close to me?
Am i that close to them as they are to me?
haha, idk.
i doubt so.

Long time never update blog le..
it's dying soon..
Happy chinese new year guys..
i'm totally not in the mood. ):
only recieved 3 ang pao.
eeyer.
no fun, nvr go ppl house bai nian.
so life-less.
:x
One week, nth much happened.
Homework stacking, skills deteriorating...common uh. ;D
Skipping erhu lesson tmr AGAIN.
x3 le. omg. ):
maybe helping pjc to perform. ^^
dk wad songs.
LOL.
nth much to update.

We're dying in less than 50 years time.
An Inconvenient Truth.

2010-02-12T08:32:00.000-08:00

原来离开现实太久，人都无法在瞬间内返回人间。

hahaha !!

还是只有我而已？

hahahahaha !!!

2010-02-09T07:09:00.000-08:00

When i tot everything was okay,

the next moment nth seems right.

when i was about to give up,

things seemed fine again.

utterly disappointed in myself.

feeling dizzy again.

stupid right.

-.-

2010-02-09T02:36:00.000-08:00

skip l and maybe d.

do i even feel hungry? no eh.

i feel numb.

haha !!!!

there's nth else i can do but to ask you to jiayou, take care and rmb to eat.

feel so fucking useless can?

2010-02-09T02:34:00.000-08:00

-blank-

wanted to post alot, but come to think of it..

like nth to say.

other than being worried worried and worried,

wad else can i say?

FUCK life.

summarised post : fuck.

2010-02-05T07:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday's concert was fantastic ! :D

except the part whr i nearly screwed my solo.

nearly only, hahas~

overall, it was a success! haha.

took some pic with Mrs aileen tan, Jeffrey ( our solo 'sexist', saxophone player), Mr Gavin Goh and Mr Sharil.

haha, then went backstage to pack stuffs.

with people shouting, Whr's my shoebag! Whr's my shirt? Whr's my bag!

lol, the situation was so chaotic !

then saw darling and emily at the backstage.

o.0 !

then faster pack pack then zhao le.

had so many things to bring home man. :x

2 instruments, one bag, one plastic bag of shoes and one costume jacket.

alot uh~

then darling and emily helped me to take the instruments. haha~

then walked home~

emily went home first..

then we went other place then he went off to buy porridge.

hahas.

then he came back with the porridge and share for dinner.

hahas.

then he sent me home~

reached home, bathed and online~

Woke up very early today~

coz yuitlin needed to borrow slippers from me.

then went to minimart to buy breakfast~

currypuff :x

hohoho~

then slack slack till grace came.

then houtian came too.

then all go my house.

on air con and slack~

was talking bout FK,FKFK and KK.

LOL.

then emily came so we ordered pizza from canadian~

then daryl came~

so played true or dare a while~

then pizza came~

they went makan makan~

slowly houtian and fandi left.

then grace and yuitlin left~

i got hungry so went to cook rice and emily wanted cheese baked rice.

anyhow cook lo~

yuitlin came back after that..

cooked emily's and yuitlin's share first.

then cook till a mess. :X

then after hers is mine~

daryl cooked mine.

hahas.

nice nice wor~ ;D

then brought everything to my room and eat..

then someone payed dota after playing zuma(?)~

-.-

-sulk-

then emily and yuitlin went out to play with the 'instant snow'..

a while later, they went home then daryl and i also went out..

went Sembawang park to walk walk~

then went sun plaza to walk walk again.

bought a hair band for my cous sis. ;D

had dinner and home ! :D

smth happened under the block. HAHAHAHAHAHA !!!

:x i nvr laugh le.

2010-02-03T08:14:00.001-08:00

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine:
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes:
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing:
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead:
This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh:
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay:
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man.. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks:
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . That will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever:
Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it:
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

2010-01-30T17:43:00.001-08:00

Fuck you la hor. you are the one who say dont go home also can. leave house lo. you say de hor. fuck you. remember wad you say bitch. if i dont keep things by the time i leave house, dont come back. THEN DONT COME BACK LOR. haha. as if i care. eat also cannot. sleep also cannot. talk to you also cannot. talk back also cannot. then dont stay with you lor. wan try? tonight i dont go home. as simple as that. hahaha.

-off phone-

2010-01-28T05:09:00.000-08:00

Hopeless is the word to describe today's training.

Had training after school today again.
was still disappointing.
):
sigh sigh sigh.
nvr go in properly,
play wrong note,
wrong tune.
wadeva la~
mistakes are all over~~
-.-
crap.
art tmr.
omg.
haven do any research or drawings.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !
feel like crying man.
i need sleep sleep sleeeeeeeeeeeep !!

2010-01-26T02:46:00.000-08:00

Alright~
time to update !
yays.
i got very high last night..
HAHA.
dont think too much..
drank too much _____ syrup so got high.
HAHA !!
funny sia...
ya ya~
the feeling was shiiiiok!
anyway,
here's the schedule for next week. ;D

Monday - Normal sch day (no training and hopefully no NE)
Tuesday - 1.45pm - 9pm at RP
Wednesday - 1-6pm at RP
Thursday ( Our BIG day ! ) - 9am - 10pm~

YAYS !!

looking forward to Thursday !
sounds abit unlike me. :x
but well..
looking forward to Thursday !
OMG !!
How i wish it's tmr but...well~
my part is still not done. :x
cough cough~
mummy's gonna buy/bring me go buy black heels.
wahaha.
eeek.
actually finds it a waste of money lor.
wear once or twice each year nia.
lols.
yeah yeah yeah yeah~~
just hope they wont put make up and tie our hair.
omg.
it's CRAP uh !
the hair like wad like that !
OMG.
okok.
end end end.

TUESDAY !!!!! ;DDDD

2010-01-23T21:08:00.000-08:00

Alright,
proper update now..
Had BBQ with Joi's Cell group again.
was a success one. ;D
though i didn't eat anything..
just went there to see them and blow wind..
:x
sat at the cliff for hours.
shiok !
time passes fast there..
idk why,
even emily agreed.
enjoy the breeze..
listen to the wave~
feel the wind~
such a nice environment..
if only i stay there. ;D
but dont like the feeling of being very moody.
lols.
then 9+ daryl came~
then went to another side to sit.
lols.
then sit sit till everyone's going to leave..
then aiqing jie send us to tampines to take bus..
then joi and daryl waited with us for the bus~ ;D
afetr we got on the bus,
we used emily's phone to call daryl..
he said that he's walking joi to her bus stop.
then say later then call.
then emily told me to sms joi saying that i'm jealous.
haha !!
so i did.
and blah blah blah~
then home sweet home <3

slept in the living room again..
woke up in the afternoon,
can't rmb when was the last time i woke up in the afternoon le.
:x
alright..
cough isn't getting any better.
woke up with a present : gastric.
-'-
then ate the food my mummy cooked for me before she left for work <3
alittlebit tasteless.
must be due to cough uh :x
and she cooked alot..
so the noodles can be my dinner too.
hahas.

Darling, jiayou for your competition ! (abit late i know. :X)

2010-01-23T09:02:00.000-08:00

updated ;X
i know i'm a cheater bug. ;DDDD

2010-01-22T05:14:00.000-08:00

Sighh.
today's prac was..
rubbish. ):
did my solo with the mic beside and stuffs.
wasn't really good uh!
i was nervous and..
i still dont really know how to go in.
-.-
then i hear myself like zhao xia.
eeeek.
the scariest thing that can happen is making the mic go
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek.
it'll be damn embarassing can !
and jiarong went mad on msn.
going like.
i'm your fan~
lols.
then when i returned to my orchestra,
ruiting say i did a good job.
ya uh.
was feeling damn crappy during prac.
:x
then end of prac got fever le.
eeeek~
:x
wadeva it is.
i got hungry and went 883 for dinner with Dewi, my new nanny..
telling me no curry, no chilli, no cold drink.
OMG UH !
no chilli!!
): ): ): ): ): ): ): ):

Morning, recieved sms from Jacq.
she say she prepared bread for me.
;D
but i didn't turn up for school. :X
missed it.
awwww~!!!
):
homeworks from her.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK.

Tmr got training again.
if i not feeling well then i wont turn up le..
and ruiting's not going.
):
who's gonna tell me when to go in and stuffs !
omg.

2010-01-21T21:18:00.001-08:00

Cute Without E

2010-01-21T07:45:00.000-08:00

My brain is tearing...
my eyes are wet..
my throat is dry..
coughing and sniffing non stop.
hugging daddy's pillow everywhr i go, coughing into it.
just like the feeling of hugging a pillow everywhr i go.
head spinning.
urge to vomit.
want to vomit but can't vomit out.
walk like jellyfish.
wad can be worse.

2010-01-21T06:06:00.000-08:00

In the room,
with just a ray of light.
With just one thing,
pk.
Using the material of it to reflect light,
i stained it and cover the reflection.

2010-01-21T05:59:00.000-08:00

I hope the medicine bring my illness and emotions away,
the drowsiness to make me sleep.
Forever.

Just feel so useless.
useless-

fk the feeling.

Dont feel like carrying on this game of Life.
i'm sorry.

2010-01-20T07:42:00.000-08:00

Baobei told me, " Ms Tan ask me did qianhui tell you that i was starring at her when i was scolding?" she told her she dunno.
"I was looking at the left side of the classroom." she said.
Trust her?
-.-

two stories said by a teacher.
talk crap la hor !

she say she was looking at ___,
now she say she looking at the left side of the classroom.
get your lies right before you say them can?
stupid.

NE meeting was...errr..
waste of time i guess. :X
alright,
i was sleeping.
haha !!
then Dewi went to my house after the meeting.
yays.
for no reason.
so was in my room reading storybook.
before we left,
i called my mother and asked somethings.
then i was coughing when she talk.
cough cough
'you sick uh'
cough cough
'okay la, nth alrdy right'
cough cough
'bye bye'
cough cough.
by the time i cough finish,
she hang the call alrdy.
then i told dewi bout this.
she was LAUGHING !
then i realised that my coughing my rythm de.
lols. :x
then we went 888~
went fairprice..
when i was paying for my stuffs,
the auntie ask me if i'm a member in chinese.
then i tot she ask 会员吗 ( is it round)
i was like huh.
ohh, member.
-.-
then dewi, the auntie and i were laughing !!!
after that jiu go home le.
yays.

I still wan nurouwan ! ;DD
addicted :x

gonna skip school tomorrow and see doc.
yays !

2010-01-19T05:28:00.001-08:00

cough cough sneeze sneeze..
when are these going to stop?
):

2010-01-19T02:51:00.000-08:00

Perfect day for perfect me. <3

start off the day with maths test !
yays!
finished it fast~
dont care then lie down. :x
then sudden spot check.
nothing caught.
;D
then maths maths.
this is when my day started to get perfect.
___ went to the toilet then she took a long time.
coz she got ______ so she took a long time.
i mean it's forgiven-able la !
wadeva lor.
then cher ask jacq go toilet find her,
so i volunteered to go, can drink water from the water cooler also ma.
so had a feeling that she's at the second floor's toilet so went down to find her.
she was there...
so helped her refill water.
then went back to class.
then cher scold ___ and say she took a long time.
then her eyes were starring at my direction.
after class, really angry liao.
it's not the first time ma.
went up to her and asked her why scold ppl must look at my direction.
she say, no. i'm looking at ___.
Wadeva la.
then i ask her why other times also stare at my direction.
she nvr say anyting and desmond chup in.
-.-
extra.
skip skip.
MT do formal letter.
nth uh~
skip skip till after school.

CO.
debrief, cher keep starring here.
i keep wondering...wad is wrong with the CO teachers' eyes?
wadeva~~~
oh before that.
maths cher came and say.
i think we got some misunderstandings between us. (again. HA.)
then she say, when she scold, she'll be starring at one direction.
like that.
i believe her?
my foot !
-.-
WWWWW!!
ohh, recieved my prac schedule le.
wonderful~

20/1
21/1
22/1
23/1
25/1
26/1
27/1
28/1
29/1

seems little uh.
gotta skip some classes just because we cannot be late for these trainings.
=.=
priority : 10th Year Anni.

who was the one that says studies is our priority.
craps.

Perfect day uh !

Reached home with the sky dark dark.
then got thunders and lightnings.
how to go out and buy dinner.
Wonderful day !

sighh...

hate to admit,
i'm afraid of thunders.
-.-

Predict: 4 Feb will be sick, down with flu, cough and fever.

2010-01-18T06:55:00.000-08:00

trying to stay positive like WTF.
stay strong in front of my parents.
tried to control my anger.
in the end,
i got angry and out rolled tears of ANGER.
FUCKER.
i said dont touch my stuffs, you dont understand is it?
why anyhow touch my stuffs and throw my stuffs?
you threw away the first converse, the first branded sling bag i own.
and it's the one you gave me.
the first bag i got from you.
you threw it.
the first bag i bought myself,
you also threw it.
the first bag i liked and you bought for me,
you threw it.
and they were in PERFECT condition.
and you didn't even bother to see wad's inside.
you didn't ask for my opinion.
you didn't ask for the condition of the bag.
you asked me to throw out the bags i dont wan or no longer can use.
i told you all the bags i wan, all can use.
you dont even listen.
and it's not only once.
if you didn't bother to listen,
then why bother to ask?
then WHY TALK TO ME.

FUCK YOU.

and you dont even feel guilty.
have you ever wondered..
when's the last time i cried in front of you?
not even because of results.
and you obviously can tell that i'm angry.
with my vulgarities scolding out,
can't you tell i'm angry?
if you were to scold me,
i swear tonight wont be peaceful, tonight wont be clean.
i've had enough.
just stop touching my stuffs !
i'll APPRECIATE it ALOT.

Wrong Wing !

2010-01-18T05:59:00.001-08:00

When things seemed as perfect it was supposed to be,
another image came and ruined it.

Cough cough cough.
damn the cough le uh.
it's super horrible in the morning and at night.
c-r-a-p.
baby bought a bottle of herbal tea for me.
and the very kind uncle put the powder powder thing inside the tea.
eeeeeeeeeeeeek !
alright,
i forced it down my throat can.
the feeling was...eeeek.
so powdery. :X
like duh ! -.-
though i didn't finish it uh.
and he finished it for me !
yays !
alright,
the throat still hurts.

Had physics test today after sch.
was...errr..
=.=
didn't study pressure and turning effect of forces.
\m/
couldn't do two of the structured Q and a couple of MCQs.
hope it doesn't affect me passing uh~

Maths test tomorrow morning before school ! ;D
maths maths maths.
-.-
hope the paper is easy and i flunk it.
screw that teacher la.
omg,
i better stop seeing her buaysong le !
=.=
anyway~
first two periods - maths !
before school - maths !
OMG.
MATHS MATHS MATHS MATHS !!!!!
=.=
going school earlier to teach baobei Jacq maths.
dunno wad prob she have, hope can help her uh.
i also not too sure bout some.
:x
if i wake up early then i shall go over to mac and buy bf then go school.
then if i'm going mac,
i gotta help baobei Jacq buy apple pie ! ;p

People changes...
feelings changes...
people drift...
feelings gone...
will we?

2010-01-17T21:21:00.001-08:00

It does not matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop.
“— Wisdom of Confucius

2010-01-17T05:18:00.001-08:00

You were born on 10th of September 1994.

:: Idealistic and need a reason to be happy.
:: Strong Family bond are important to them.
:: Their decisions are driven by their emotion.
:: Like to help and take care others.
:: Loyal and a good teacher.
:: Love musics.
:: Loyal to those who are serious in relationship.
:: Need to learn what can and can't change.